10 things
by SuperGleek
Summary: Everybody has their secrets right? the gleeks are no exception. 10 things you didn't know about each glee club member. read & review please
1. Tina

10 things nobody knows about Tina Cohen-Chang

1. Her first kiss was with Noah Puckerman at Quinn Fabray's 13th birthday party. She was invited by default (their dads worked together) and Santana Lopez had decided that everybody had to play spin the bottle. It was dry and sweet and a hell of a lot more gentle than she was expecting. Then when it was over Puck wiped his mouth with his sleeve and gagged and she knew she was going to get a slushie facial tomorrow. Strangely enough Puck never even spoke to her until glee

2. She still remembers the first time she meet Artie in freshman science class and he gave her that amazing smile of his. She remembers think what a cute guy like him was doing smiling at her. Then she saw the chair.

3. She own a extensive amount of lingerie. Something Artie had mentioned on several occasions that he loves about her

4. She never really saw the appeal of Finn Hudson. Seriously the guy thought he conceived a baby in a hot tub. Plus his hair sort of reminds her of Jimmy Neutron at times

5. She once had a two hour long conversation with Matt about Kurt's clothes and Frank Sinatra music. Turns out he's not a mute, just painfully shy and observant

6. She knows the lyrics to every High School Musical song

7. She sang "i kissed a girl" at the glee tryouts as a dare from Artie, and yes the pelvic thrust was his idea too. She didn't actually think she would get in.

8. She didn't realize how much her stutter had taken over her life until she stopped. Sometimes she still stumbles over words when she meets new people

9. After the tap dance routine Artie took one look at her and wheeled himself out of the auditorium and Tina was left crying in Mike Chang's arm's. When she was climbing out of his bedroom window at three in the morning she realized that she had well and truly screwed herself. It was the only moment in her life she ever truly felt like a bad person.

10. She really had no idea Mike was in love with her until he whispered it to her at midnight while he thought she was asleep.

Hey guys. Well this is my first attempt at glee fanfiction, so please review and let me know if it was a complete and total failure or it didn't totally suck. I plan to write a list for the entire glee club, so next up is Kurt Hummel


	2. Kurt

10 things nobody knows about Kurt Hummel

1. Making out with Brittany was his worst idea ever. Seriously, it beats that time he tried to get his dad to wear silk Hugo Boss. MAJOR failure.

2. If he were ever transported to some twisted universe where Santana were a nun and Rachel never wore argyle and Kurt were straight Mercedes would totally be his dream woman. The smile on her face when he told her this was so totally worth admitting it during a glee slumber party.

3. He inherited his singing voice from his Grandma Iris. Both his parents are totally tone deaf, bless their cotton socks and polyester shorts.

4. When Kurt started his first day of third grade the first friend he made was Dave Karofsky. By fourth grade Azimio had moved to Lima and that was the end of that friendship. Which was a shame really, his mother had the best dress up clothes from the 70's

5. Kurt loves cars. Sure he hates the oil and the stains and ugly coveralls but he could deal with them. He just loved the way all pieces fit together, it fascinates him.

6. Nobody had ever called him handsome. Delicate, exquisite, cute, adorable, pretty, angelic, beautiful like a bunny (that one was from Brittany) but never handsome.

7. He knows Finn will never like him, that him and queen of the knee socks Rachel Berry are made in bad teenage movie heaven. But it still hurt to have him yell and finch away from him. Honest truth? It's a lot easier to fall for someone you know you haven't got a shot in hell with, the rejection and homophobic comments don't sting as badly.

8. Sometimes he swears Matt Ruthford is staring at him

9. He loves fashion not because he's gay and not because he's shallow but because his mother used to make his clothes for him and she was the one that taught him that being different is ok.

10. Someone has been slipping him little notes in his locker since he joined the football team.

A/N - ok so I'm totally and completely blown away by the attention my little list got, so since i have already written Kurt's list i thought i might as well post it. Also thank you to my first two reviewers, seriously you guys are like my heroes of the week.

Ok so enjoy Kurt's musings and before i sign off i just had a little idea about a one shot of the glee kids having a party to celebrate glees renewal for the next year. Basically everything gets shot to hell and turned upside down, so if anybody wants to see that let my know. Ok I'll stop now. Next up is Miss Santana Lopez 


	3. Santana

10 things nobody knows about Santana Lopez

1. She hates the Cheerio's uniform. It was cool when your a freshman, but now? she was just waiting till graduation to burn it.

2. She really had only ever slept with six people. Problem is if one of them is Puck everybody is going to know about it.

3. Brittany was her soulmate and when they left Lima there was no more hook ups with other guys and secret meeting after Cheerio's practice. She really couldn't wait.

4. She hates the smell of alcohol. For two years after her mother ran away with the neighbor's husband it was all her father had smelt like.

5. She only attended Rachel Berry's glee slumber party because Britt made her, seriously and the only reason she did Kurt's nails was because she was bored. Honestly its not like shes friends with them or anything.

6. She despises the way jocks treat Kurt.

7. When she grows up she wants to be Sue Sylvester. Sure shes evil and barren and doesn't own anything besides work out clothing, but she was smart and determined. Sue Sylvester had never taken shit from anybody.

8. When that back stabbing, doe eyed man whore Jesse St James had betrayed their glee club he actually had the balls to ask if she "wanted to learn the true meaning of an explosive performance". She honestly considered killing him. Then when he called Puck "a waste of time, air, space and talent" she broke three of his fingers. Puck might be a horny, moronic bully who had super sperm but he was her horny, moronic bully, and nobody insulted him. Ever.

9. Finn was sweet. Not mind blowing or spectacular, but he was gentle and nervous and asked if he was doing it right and if she was ok. Santana could honestly say she had finally realized what Man Hands, Quinn and Hummel all saw in him.

10. Even though she was semi dating Puck, screwing around with Mike, had sex with Finn, hooking up with her history teacher Mr Anders and continued to visit her ex boyfriend Javier, she only person she had ever spent the night with is Britt.

A/N - Again I'm so happy people like this fic, seriously i can't begin to tell you guys how nervous i was about writing. Alrighty next up is...MATT RUTHFORD 


	4. Matt

10 thinks nobody knows about Matt Ruthford

1. The first time he realized he was gay was when Mike called him up and asked if he wanted to watch the DVD Brittany had sent him of her "doing this totally hot dance with the scary Asian vampire girl and her gay friend". Naturally he had to see that.

So when Mike puts the DVD in you both sit back on the couch and then your both shocked at the black and white homage to Beyonce. First thing you notice is that Tina looks way better without all that junk on her face. The second this you notice is that Britt is really good at dancing to "Single Ladies" and the third thing you notice is Kurt Hummel shaking' his white boy booty to Beyonce and you notice how pretty his hair looks and how Britt was totally right, this dance is sexy.

When the clip finishes both you and Mike have pillows on you laps and are mumbling excuses about needing to go pee.

2. He waxes his chest.

3. He was that national spelling bee champ in Junior High. He still reads the dictionary for fun

4. When he finishes school he wants to become a fire fighter. It's been his dream since kindergarten when his uncle Steven came to visit and told you all about his job in Chicago

5. The first person Matt came out to was Mike. It was when he were getting that damn spider out of his ear. He still remembers the conversation word for word.

Matt - "Dude I'm gay"

Mike - "Ok"

6. Rachel Berry scares him. She reminds him of his grandma Celine, who he's pretty sure is Satan in disguise.

7. Frank Sinatra is his favorite singer. If he ever grows a pair and asks Hummel on a date he is singing "Fly me to the moon" outside his window.

8. He's pretty sure that if he were a chick and Mike were a chick and they were both like 40 and still hot they would totally be lesbian together.

9. When Tanaka told them to choose between glee and football, the option of quitting glee didn't even enter his mind.

10. He really wishes he had the courage to tell Kurt who's putting those notes in his locker.

A/N - Here Matt, poor love sick Matt. Ok so do you guys think Matt and Kurt should get together? because i am totally convinced that Matt is gay and Kurt needs love.

Next up is the wonderful and completely under used Mike Chang. 


	5. Mike

10 things nobody knows about Mike Chang

1. When he was five his mom made him take ballet lessons with his sister. He still drives to the city for lessons twice a week.

2. He has this totally irrational urge to kick Artie Abrams. It started when he overheard him bragging to Finn about Tina's amazing collection of Victoria's Secret.

3. Even his grandmother calls him other Asian. Sue Sylvester is a bitch.

4. The most embarrassing moment of his friendship with Matt was after watching the "Single Ladies" DVD. He seriously had no idea Tina could move like that. Then the DVD ended and Matt was in exactly the same position i was in, pillow on lap and slightly out of breath. We both sorta mumbled and ran to the bathrooms.

Most awkward moment ever.

5. He can speak Cantonese, Spanish, French, Italian and Swedish.

6. Brittany was one the sweetest people he had the pleasure of knowing.

7. He wasn't suppose to try out for football. On his first day of High School, he was being chased by Puck with a fire extinguisher. Coach Tanaka saw him run from the door and told the then 14 year old Mike that he was trying out for football after school and to tell his friend with the Mohawk to join him. So really it was all Pucks fault he was a jock.

8. Every time he hooks up with Santana he feels a little guiltier. Not only were her and Britt so obviously in love that no man was going to win either girls hearts, but he always felt a little emptier inside after each time.

9. He once considered asking Mercedes out on a date to get closer to Tina. Then he was horrified at what a desperate, asshole move that would be.

10. A crying Tina in his arms broke his heart, so he tried to kiss all her pain away. An hour later they were on his bed, naked and sweating. Mike swore to god this was all too good to be true. Then he was holding a sleeping Tina in his arms, so he told her he loved her because he was too much of a coward to say it while she was conscious. When he woke up, cold and alone, it was almost like his chest was about to cave in. It was the single worst moment of his life.

A/N - Poor poor Mike. Him and Matt really can't catch a break. Well thats glee clubber number five. Up next is Quinn Fabray 


	6. Quinn

10 things nobody knows about Quinn Fabray

1. She never wanted to join the cheerios, her friend Crystal did. When they showed up at tryouts coach Sylvester took one look at lanky dark awkward Crystal and dismissed her, then she demanded Quinn tryout.

2. She hates maternity clothing. She doesn't care what the sales ladies say she looks and feels like a cow in pastels.

3. Sometimes she really hates Rachel Berry. Not because shes talented or has good hair. No its because she gets everything. Solos, Puck, Finn, great legs, flattering posts on Jew fro's blog. Rachel has everything Quinn wants and will never get.

4. The body part she misses the most is her ankles. She had the best ankles and now they look like blown up condoms in flip flops.

5. She thinks the baby hormones are making her insane. She found herself fantasizing about licking whipped cream off Mr Shu the other day. She still can't look him in the eye.

6. The stupidest moment of her life was actually trusting Noah Puckerman when he said "trust me". Who the hell trusted Noah Puckerman?, it was like copying Brittany's homework, everybody except Finn had the common sense not to do it.

7. She cared about Finn. Maybe not loved, but she truly cared about his feelings.

8. She never really liked her father, but she didn't hate him until he kicked her out. Hypocrite, after all Quinn was born six months after her parents wedding day. Like she wouldn't pick up on that.

9. She had the biggest crush on Matt in 6th grade. He had the sweetest smile. Problem was she had never even heard him speak until glee.

10. Even though she got kicked out of her home, lost all respect from her peers, lost her boyfriend and her body, when she looks at the sonogram and watches Puck play "Beth" to her stomach she can't really bring herself to regret sleeping with him.

A/N - Well heres Quinn, who was strangely hard to write about. Review please, because now I'm totally addicted to feed back lol. Up next is the fine Noah Puckerman. 


	7. Puck

10 things nobody knows about Noah Puckerman

1. When he was in like fifth grade their teacher made them write a report on what they wanted to be when they grow up Puck totally wanted to be Chuck Norris. That guy was what you call a badass.

2. He will murder any asshole that tries to blink in his sisters direction. That punk was totally checking out her ass, he remembers being eight.

3. He really wishes he could keep Beth. He knows Quinn doesn't belive him when he says he wouldn't bail out, but its true. He would do anything for his little girl.

4. Having Finn hate him was a lot harder than he thought it would be.

5. Not that he'd ever tell anybody but he felt really bad when he put wheels in the porta potty. It was Azimio's idea anyway.

6. When he came home from sectional and told his mother that he got Quinn Fabray pregnant she didn't look angry or shocked, just real sad. When he told her he was sorry all she could say to him was "you always are Noah".

That was when he decided he was going to change.

7. He hasn't slushied anybody since he got one to the face. That shit burned.

8. He once tried to get into Finn's mom's pants. Then just before he was gunna take off his shirt and suggest he "look at her pipes" he realized that this wasn't him being a badass, this was just him being an ass so he bolted out as soon as he could.

9. He cried like a little bitch when he got his nipple pierced.

10. He lied to Rachel Berry when he said he was going to break up with her anyway.

A/N - And heres Noah. I hope I'm not updating too fast for you guys, its just i have most of these written out so i get a little impatient.

Anyway these lists are getting harder and harder, although I'm not sure why. Again thank you to all those who review, you guys make my day.

I have decided I'm going to write the one shot i mentioned so look forward to some Murt (thank you AdamPascalFan for that one lol) action, a drunk Mike Chang and some good old fashion Rachel Berry walk outs.

Speaking of Rachel Berry shes up next =]  



	8. Rachel

10 things nobody knows about Rachel Berry

1. The first time she meet April Rhodes was the first time she ever doubted her future. April was beautiful and talented, so why wasn't she a star?

2. It took her a full week to figure out what went wrong the first time she kissed Finn, then when she figured it out she couldn't help but feel a little proud of herself.

3. When Jesse betrayed her and the glee club she ripped the head off his ugly care bear and burnt it in her living room fire place.

4. She knows Finn lied when he said he didn't sleep with Santana.

5. Sometimes she finds herself strangely attracted to Brittany.

6. The worst moment in her life was when everybody walked out of the practice room after the "Run Joey Run" fiasco. It was then she realized that she had completely betrayed the three people who really cared about her.

7. Most people think it was her fathers that told her she was going to be a star. in reality it was her tap dancing teacher Madam Bryant.

8. The only time she had ever felt truly furious was during fifth grade when the teachers made everybody write mothers day cards.

Their new teacher Miss Marple had only been in town for a month, so when little Rachel Berry had told her she didn't have a mommy, Miss Marple had assumed she was dead. When she found out that Rachel had two daddies, she overheard Miss Marple complained to another teacher it was disgusting, so Rachel threw a bucket of pink paint at Miss Marple's head.

Her dads scolded her in the principals office, but when they got home they gave her a bowl of ice cream and told her they were proud but, maybe next time somebody said something like that she should just tell them instead of assaulting people with paint.

9. Sometimes shes jealous of Mercedes. Not because of her talent, but because everybody seems to appreciate her more.

10. Deep down she knows her and Finn were made for each other, even if life keeps interrupting their romance.

A/N - Here Rachel. I know a lot of people are Puck/Rachel shippers and that's cool, but i find that Puck being in love with Rachel is a little far fetched. She is way too much for him to handle, what Rachel needs is a patient guy like Finn at least for now. 


	9. Brittany

10 things nobody knows about Brittany

1. She has a pet bunny named Puck. The real Puck gave it to her for her 16th birthday.

2. Shes super awesome at Mario brothers games.

3. Her cat totally reads her diary. Santana is so wrong. It's evil

4. The first person she made out with was Santana. They were having a slumber party and were watching this movie about a guy who bit the head off a chicken, which was like totally gross. So they turned it off and she turned to Santana and they stated talking about movies and stuff and she looked so pretty and her hair was really shiny so i kissed her. She tasted like caramel.

5. When she grows up shes going to teach little kids how to dance.

6. She totally hooked up with that guy who plays piano. It took forever to catch up with him. It was really mean of him to run when she asks if he wants to make out, but its ok because she got him.

7. Coach Sylvester might be like mean and loud, but she can be really nice. Like when they found that bird in her locker and she was the only one who didn't yell at her. She still has to ask Santana what "imbecile" means though

8. The person she loves the most after Santana is her brother Brett. He totally gets the gay sharks thing.

9. Kurt really reminds her of Puck the bunny. They have the same color hair.

10. Even thought she sometimes forgets stuff like names and rooms and days, she totally notices other things. Like how Mike stares Tina who stares at Artie or how Mercedes stares at Puck who stares at Rachel while Rachel stares at Finn while Finn stares at Quinn who stares at Mr Shu who stares at Matt staring at Kurt. Santana says their all heartbroken. Shes so glad she already found the person she loves.

A/N - Britt and Santana love yay! as far as I'm concerned these two are made in heaven, so there will be no affairs or arguments or issues with these two. God knows I've completely screwed everyone else's relationships lol.

For somebody who says very little in the show Brittany was the hardest to write about and i feel like i didn't do her justice, so please if anybody thinks i messed this one up let me know. I wasn't completely satisfied with it but i feel like it's the best i could do.

I'm thinking about doing a full length fic after i finish the list and the one shot. it'll about the glee kids over summer. good idea? bad idea? nobody cares? let me know =]

Ok next up is the man with the voice of a sex god Mr Artie Abrams. 


	10. Artie

10 things nobody knows about Artie Abrams

1. He really hated those KISS pants. You have no idea how hard it is for a paraplegic to get into leather pants.

2. The only reason he decided to talk to Tina was because she had a disability. It took him a month to realize she was

kind of hot.

3. He will never take advice from Puck again. Telling Tina about his fully functional penis was definitely not the right

thing to say.

4. He was never really an athletic kid. Even at eight years old playing any sport was more a favor to his dad than

anything.

5. He realized he loved Tina when she climbed into his window at midnight to give him his birthday present.

When she woke him up she looked so nervous and all she said was "happy birthday" before taking off her long black

coat to revel the lacy underwear she had underneath.

Best birthday ever.

6. Sometimes he swears Mike Chang is out to get him. Theres only so many times a persons bag can hit you in the face

before you start to get suspicious.

7. When Puck made those pot cupcakes he couldn't help but feel a little happy. Sure he was stoned for the rest of the day

and Puck planned to give most of the money to Quinn but Puck cared enough to drug everybody in school so Artie

could have a chance to ride with the team.

8. He learnt a long time ago to never dwell on things you can't change. As a result he's pretty sure he's the only person in

glee club with out some sort of romantic, friendship, physical, sexual or mental crisis.

9. He refused to speak to his mother for a month after the accident. It didn't seem fair that she got away barely a scratch

while Artie could never walk again. When he remembers her sobbing at night for the entire month his stomach still

twist and he feels sick with himself.

10. He prays to god that when he saw Mike leading Tina into his car he was just giving her a ride home.

A/N - Dear god the plot thickens, i mean it's really Artie you got to feel sorry for in this little love triangle. Although to

be fair all three of them did get screwed over pretty badly. I almost feel bad for causing all this drama and heartbreak.

Does anybody out there consider Mr shu and Brad the piano guy glee club members? because i can't decide. And again

thank you reviewers, especially those who review every chapter. you guys make me so freaking' happy.

Up next the recently outted dive Mercedes Jones. 


	11. Mercedes

10 things nobody knows about Mercedes Jones

1. Her entire family is quiet. She doesn't think she's ever heard anybody in her house scream or sing before.

2. She hated being on the cheerios. Insane diets and cheerleading coaches aside, the practices, the 14 minuets of Celine Dion in French, the stilts. A girl just can't live like that.

3. She likes her body. Coach Sylvester might complain she's too fat but her curves are smoking' hot and she knows it.

4. She knows that one day her and Kurt will leave this tiny town and become real stars. They just choose not to be so damn vocal about it.

5. She doesn't hate Santana. She sure as hell ain't going to be adding her onto her Christmas card list anytime soon, but Puck and The Viper were like the popular, sexually active version of her and Kurt. She sort of gets it.

6. She's kind of flattered Azimio wants to "tap that fine ass", but her disgust is just too great to ever even consider that match made in hell.

7. Shes glad Quinn's staying at her house. She needs company from someone that isn't talking about teeth or 8th grade essays on the civil war.

8. She knows Matt wants Kurt, but if Matt ever hurts Kurt she will sleep with Azimio just to get him to beat Matt's behind down to a pulp.

9. She had honestly thought Kurt liked her, you know romantically, but shes sort of glad he turned out to be gay. She was never really attracted to him.

10. She really thought she could change Puck. Then she felt like a damn fool for even trying

A/N - There you have her ladies and gentlemen the wonderful Miss Jones. Honestly i love her, plus she resisted Puck which is like a near impossible feat so she's got my respect.

I just added a one shot of Mike and Tina's kiss after the "dream a little dream of me" tap dance. I know I'm beginning to

sound like a pessimist but i really need the feedback so i can sleep easy. Tell me if it good, tell me if its bad or whatever you think.

Ok list almost done. Only Finn, Mr Shu and Brad left. I decided to do them, only because Brad is awesome.

I'm also getting a strange urge to write about Burt Hummel, except he's not in glee. Which sucks.

And i just noticed I'm almost up to 100 reviews, which is like mind blowing considering its my first story. So thank you everybody. Ok my little speech is done now. 


	12. Finn

10 things nobody knows about Finn Hudson

1. The only reason he started dating Quinn was because it made sense. He was quarterback, she was head cheerleader, he was Finn, she was Quinn. It was like God was telling them to date.

2. Ever since he meet Rachel the mailman thing has completely failed every time.

3. One day he'll make Puck pay for getting his girlfriend pregnant. But for now he sort of just misses him.

4. When he yelled at Kurt he couldn't sleep for the whole night. Mr Shu's couch was kind of small and his head kept pounding, repeating the word fag over and over. Finally he got up and went to wash his face and decided that, yeah Kurt had a crush on him and life sucked right now, but Burt was right and he had to fix this.

Lucky Mrs Shu was into red rubber shower curtains.

5. Sometimes when things suck, like really really suck, he talks to his dad.

6. He's really glad Burt Hummel is dating his mother. He's nice to her, he'll never cheat on her and he never complains about her cooking. Plus he makes her happy, and nobody deserves to be happy more than his mom.

7. He knows Mr Shu told them not to attack Jesse after he egged Rachel, but seriously she was crying about baby chickens all day. He had to do something.

Besides putting a dead rat under his car seat wasn't really an attack.

8. He knows Mr Shu planted the pot in his locker. He figured it out on his way to sectionals. Then he realized Mr Shu sort of did him a favor, so he decided to just get over it.

9. Sometimes when its raining still he wishes the baby were his. Then he sees Puck singing "Beth" and Quinn looking at him in a way she never looked at him and he realizes that it was never meant to be his kid, no matter how badly he wants it. It's funny, when he thought the baby was his all he could do was wish it would disappear.

10. He wasn't kidding when he said that she couldn't get rid of him that easily. He was going to win back Rachel, no matter what it took.

A/N - Almost done. That was Finny D there, the last of the glee kids. Now all that is left is Mr Shu and Brad. God I'm going to miss this list. It really helped me relax after school and amuse myself.

So i don't think the full length fic is going to happen. I'm sorry, but my exams come first.

That's not to say thought i don't have a few one shots up my sleeve, so when i have time and inspiration I'll try my best to write as much as i can. Belive it or not i have the Glee kid's lives all planned out, from High School till death so there won't be any shortage of material for me to use.

Anyway next up is Mr Shu and his racist Disney animal filled hair. 


	13. William

10 things nobody knows about William Schuester

1. He hates his hair. Besides being ammunition to Sue Sylvester's endless stream of abuse he has been called 'Curly Moe' one too many times to ever truly like it. The only reason he keeps it long is because Emma once mentioned she liked it.

2. He knows that sometimes he gets a little too close to his students. He's probably given one too many hugs to Quinn and had one too many private conversations with Finn and danced a little too close to Brittany and Mike, but he can't help it. He tends to forget their his students and not his own children to shower affection on.

3. He knows exactly where each of his students will end up in ten years time. He knows that Rachel, Mercedes, Kurt and Mike are all too talented not to get noticed. He knows that Tina, Santana, Quinn and Matt are all too smart not to end up as billionaires. He knows that Finn will always be content in Lima and he knows that Artie and Puck are are charismatic enough to do anything with their lives.

4. The first person he ever meet at McKinley High was Sue and he remembers feeling completely and utterly stunned when he heard her introduce herself as "The single most important person you will ever meet in you dull and repetitive existence, now remove yourself, I need to go order special hand made Australian possum skin uniforms for my cheerios"

5. The first person he had ever kissed wasn't Terri, it was a giant hulking mass of muscle named Hank Ruthford. It was after his first ever Glee rehearsal when he was 14 and he trying on his fluro yellow bell bottom jeans with matching jacket costume when suddenly Hank spun him around and gave him the most passionate kiss he had ever received. He almost had a heart attack when Matt walked into his office that day to audition, their resemblance is uncanny.

6. Emma Pillsbury reminded him of Cinderella. A beautiful and sweet princess only the luckiest bastard in the world got to keep.

7. He knows he favors Finn and Rachel, and to a lesser extent Artie, Puck and Mercedes but he can't help it. Problem is he hasn't got the slightest idea what to do with the others. Santana's voice was a little too aggressive, Quinn's was a little too jazzy, Brittany's had an odd monotone to it and Tina's was some sort of odd cross between sweet and husky. He wasn't sure if Matt or Mike could even sing and Kurt was an entirely different ball game. When he started glee he had no idea that there could be such a confusing amount of talent and genres.

8. He can honestly say Brad is one of the coolest guys to walk the planet.

9. Ever since Brittany waltzed into his office and asked if he would like to make out "because coach said I should totally try it and if I could get pictures it would be awesome" he had stared carrying a rape whistle and keeping his office door locked.

10. When he found out Terri's pregnancy was fake fake he can't say he was shocked, he wasn't as oblivious as people thought he was. It didn't stop his heart from breaking when it was confirmed though.

A/N - And I'm back in the game. Hello all and I'm so sorry this took months to update, but here i am!

anyway this is Mr Schuester list. I'm feeling a little out of practice so if this isn't up to scratch please let me know.

Next up is the ever elusive Brad the piano guy AKA tinkles =] 


	14. Brad

10 things nobody knows about Brad

1. If one more person calls him Tinkles he will use his black belt skills on them.

2. Sometimes he gets the feeling those kids are stalking him. He can't even spend a quiet lunchtime alone going over song arrangements and enjoying a cup of coffee without a crazy Jewish diva demanding he play a totally inappropriate Lady Gaga song so she can have a duet with her long lost surrogate mother.

3. Just once he would like to have a practice with someone touching the piano. Those little worms don't seem to realize how long it takes to polish out the scratches after their done expressing their love via song.

4. As creepy and perverted as it makes him feel he can honestly say that some of the women to enter the choir room are the hottest he had ever seen. That Sue Sylvester...

5. All of the guesses about his identity had been wrong so far. He was not Batman, a mob boss, a secret pimp, a vampire, a sneaky gay or the source of all evil. He did however paint houses in the summer.

6. One day he will tell all those brats just how annoying and over dramatic they all were. Till then he'll just entertain himself with his voodoo dolls.

7. He had struck up a nice little friendship with Will, even if the guy was a weepy drunk he did know some awesome Tupac raps.

8. Brittany Pierce needs to learn not to chase people for kisses. Hadn't anybody taught the damn girl about playing hard to get? or about student teacher laws in Ohio?

9. Even though he feels like strangling them most of the time, the new directions team was his so when he informs the Ohio show choir board that the Vocal Adrenalin pianist worked as an assassin on weekend he didn't feel too bad. His competitive streak didn't allow for guilt.

10. Most of the time he can't stand the kids but other days, like his birthday when each student brought him a gift and Rachel baked him a cake he figures their not always so bad.

A/kind of - Finished. Wow I'm kind of sad now, its like my first born child just left home or something.

Man Brad is a grumpy old bastard! but I figured he would be grumpy. People keep sitting on his piano and messing up his hair. And yes I have decided that Brad and Sue are having a secret affair where they have crazy monkey sex every Sunday. Also I have Sam's list all written out, should I post it or do you guys just want to stick to the original 12 glee members?

Ok so I'm totally open to oneshot ideas and requests, so if you want to see me write something please let me know.

Thank you to everybody who read and reviewed this, you guys are totally and completely awesome. Also I think I need a beta so if anybody wants the job feel free to send me a private message. 


	15. Sam

10 things nobody knows about Sam Evans

1. His hair really is naturally that blonde. He just didn't have the courage to tell Quinn his real secret.

2. He doesn't like Ohio, like at all. It's boring, cold, small minded and people seem to fry everything here.

3. He will never, ever introduce Puck to his mother. He seriously thinks he needs therapy after the guys at his old school showed him a copy of Playboy she had modeled in.

4. He's a sucker for a set of pretty eyes. So when he was first introduced to Artie and his electric blue eyes his jaw almost dropped. Kurt's eyes made him want to gaze into them for hours at a time and Puck's gave him strange homoerotic feelings.

5. He wasn't gay, Quinn had pretty much erased all feeling he might have had towards guys. But the fact is his last relationship was with a science geek named Paul DiMaggio, who had eyes the color of pure silver and who knew the names of all the constellations. He was a firm believer in falling in love with a person not a gender

6. He hated words. He hates the fact he can't read them, he hates the jumbled up way they look on paper and he hates how there are so many of them. Most of all he hates the fact that he's forced to learn them.

7. He was taught never to judge another persons situation, choices or mistakes. As a result of this he can't understand how people can be homophobic, sexist, racist or misogynistic.

8. His entire family was in the modeling industry. His grandmother modeled for Chanel in the 50's. His mother modeled for Vivian Westwood in the 80's and his sister is currently the face of Marc Jacobs fall line. He decided not to tell anybody in Lima of his though. He's had enough weirdos hit on his mother to last a lifetime and he's pretty sure Kurt will forever stalk his grandmother once he found out that she was a good friend of Coco Chanel.

9. He knows what he did to coach Beiste was wrong and cruel. Vanity was one of his vices and after growing up in a family where being beautiful was the most important thing he is ashamed to admit he judges people on appearance. He is working on fixing that but after years of being shallow it's a hard habit to break.

10. He can't for the life of him understand why the glee kids are so unpopular. Artie was six different kinds of awesome, Puck was one of the most loyal guys he had ever met, Mike was a genuinely the nicest guy in Lima, Finn was too clueless to hate and Kurt and Matt were so in love it warmed his heart. While Rachel was a little abrasive, she always meant well; Santana and Brittany were the lesbian version of Matt and Kurt and Tina's wit and sarcasm were the highlight of his day, he's pretty sure he has a minor crush on Mercedes and Quinn was the greatest person he had ever meet. How could people hate them?

A/N - Ok so I cracked. This really is the last one though so unless we get a new member joining glee club this is it. Please please please review and tell me what you honestly loved and hates about these lists.

I noticed Sam could be kind of shallow and I decided that his entire family consists of beautiful blonde people. Also he did indeed have a boyfriend at his old school but didn't think Quinn would understand. But please do not let his vanity ruin the charcter for you, nobody is perfect even if they do look like a Ken doll. Did you think my description of the glee club was accurate?, because I also cannot figure out why their so unpopular. They all seem so damn cool and attractive.

Also who knows how to write smut? I want to learn, badly. Tina and Mike's hook up needs to be documented!  
I think I'm going to start a smut campaign for Tike, Katt and Puck/brittana threesome.

Ok so now that I have broadcasted my lust for lust, I just want to say again thank you to everybody who read this and reviewed. 


	16. Lauren

10 Things you didn't know about Lauren Zizes

She's a complete and total slut. Seriously she's slept with half the football team, Jacob and the entire A.V. club. How stereotypical of her right? But really it has nothing to do with self esteem. She just really really likes sex.

Her second cousin is Dave Karofsky and she sincerely hopes nobody ever make the connection. She's almost ashamed to be related to that asshole.

She hopes that one day someone from the Glee club can wake up and be her for a day, just so they can see what a complete fool their making out of themselves. Who the hell does sexy routines to Push It at school assembly's and dresses up as Lady Gaga and goes around trying to convince devout Christians their vampires?

She should be depressed because of her looks, she should be desperate to be popular, and she should be worried that she can actually say she's held a conversation with Jacob Ben Israel about something other than Rachel Berry or McKinley gossip. She should have the lowest self esteem in the entire school but she doesn't. She is who she is, and if people didn't like it they can get screwed.

She can sing and totally sound like Judy Garland. She kills 'The Trolley Song'

Puckerman was a complete and total bastard. She still can't figure out how she fell in love with the idiot. It was probably the arms.

Show choir is fun, stupid but fun. It's nice to talk to someone who isn't a bulimic wrestler or crazy Jewish pervert.

She truly and passionately hates her mother. The worst part about that? Her mother really loves her, she just loves her brother more

Her brother Mason is currently enrolled at Stanford University and is the star basketball player there. She has never been able to forgive him for refusing to acknowledge their family connection when she started high school.

Sometimes she thinks she's going to spend the rest of her life alone, prickly and sarcastic. But then Rachel invites her to a slumber party and she talks Sylvia Plath with Tina and Mercedes asks her where she gets her skirt from. Show choir may be stupid but nobody can deny it's got its charms.

_**A/N – Ok I give up, I'm never going to be fully able to give up these lists up so whenever somebody new joins up the glee club there getting a list whether you people like it or not. **_

_**I know people are asking why I don't just write out a list for everybody. Truthfully I'm not that interested in anybody else, plush the thought of having to imitate Sue Sylvester gives me stage fright so I'm just going to stick with the glee club. **_

_**On a completely unrelated matter has anybody heard the glee version of the song "hello twelve, hello thirteen, hello love"? Because it's awesome and I'm pretty sure it's an autobiographical retelling of my puberty years. Plush it's sung as a duet with Lea Michele and Jon Geoff, so you just know it's made of pure greatness. **_

_**I like Lauren; she's got spunk and confidence which appeals to me. I also get the feeling she's a whore, please don't ask me why I have no idea. **_

_**As always thank you for taking the time to read my pointless rambling and please don't hesitate to tell me what you thought of Lauren's list. No seriously, don't hesitate =] **_


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